why in the year 2025 we can 3D print houses, clone sheep, and literally talk to robots on our phones…but NO baby wipe company has figured out how to make their wipes come out of the package ONE at a time?! Why is it that every time I pull one, I either get 17 in a clump or none because the next one has retreated back into the void?? I’m over here mid-diaper change doing finger gymnastics, trying to untangle the mess like I’m in a game of wipe Jenga. Honestly, if they’d just put a warning label—“Good luck, sucker”—I’d at least appreciate the honesty.

Come on, scientists. We have smart fridges and self-driving cars. WHERE is my smart wipe dispenser?!